Susan Lehman wasn’t happy when she walked into her kitchen one morning and saw a sink overflowing with dirty dishes.
The mess was courtesy of her husband, Matt, who had hosted friends for a sports night. But just as she was about to launch into a silent (or not-so-silent) rage, she noticed something unexpected—a note.
It was simple, just three words: “I got it!”
@susandoingsusanthings Leaving a simple note instantly made me not care about the dishes in the sink!! I love communication and we have come so far!! #susandoingsusanthings #marriedlife #marriage #marriagehumor #marriagegoals #marriagecomedy #marriagelife ♬ original sound – SusanDoingSusanThings
Her frustration melted. Instead of waking up to a passive-aggressive standoff over unwashed plates, Susan felt something different—acknowledged.
“I just love that he recognized the mess and took responsibility,” she shared on TikTok. “We’ve come so far.”
Susan’s video quickly took off, racking up 3.5 million views and 509,000 likes as people weighed in on Matt’s small but meaningful gesture.
A Note That Divided the Internet
Some commenters saw this as a win for healthy communication.
“The note changes everything! Amazing communication,” one person wrote.
Another agreed, saying, “It’s not just about cleaning—it’s about acknowledging the impact of your actions.”
Others thought this was a refreshing sign of progress in relationships, with one user saying, “Accountability & acknowledgment mean more than people realize!”
But not everyone was impressed.
@susandoingsusanthings Replying to @dumnez.eu Husband reveal! The comment section in this original original video is so hilarious!! But has given us the best inside jokes! Have the hard talks go through your shit and don’t give up! #susandoingsusanthings #bareminimum #relationship #marriedlife #marrigehumor #relationships #relationshipgoals #relationshipadvice #relationshiptips ♬ original sound – SusanDoingSusanThings
“The bar is on the floor,” one skeptical commenter wrote.
Another added, “Bare minimum behavior.”
A more sarcastic response read: “Wow. A grown man acknowledged his own mess. Let’s throw a parade.”
Susan wasn’t having it. She clapped back, reminding critics that this was about communication, not just dishes.
A Shift in Their Marriage
Susan and Matt have been together for over 25 years. But their marriage didn’t always include sweet notes next to dirty dishes.
“After we got married, we fell into the typical roles—I handled the cleaning, and he did ‘man things,'” Susan told Today. “For a long time, that worked. But one day, I thought, ‘Other people can help in this house.’”
That realization sparked some tough conversations. Slowly, things changed. Matt started cooking dinners, pitching in with laundry—without being asked—and, yes, washing the dishes.
“Matt and I are high school sweethearts, but it feels like a new relationship,” Susan shared. “The old me would have freaked out over the mess. But the old Matt wouldn’t have left a note, either.”
More Than Just a Note
While some people dismissed the gesture as “bare minimum effort,” Susan saw it as a symbol of progress.
“That so-called ‘bare minimum’ note was the max for me,” she said.
Her takeaway? Small changes can make a big difference.
“Our communication is better than ever,” she concluded. “And now, everyone in our family—including our teenage sons—pitches in. I can’t tell you how much our lives have changed.”
So, what do you think? Is Matt’s note a sign of a healthy relationship—or proof that the bar for men is way too low? Let us know in the comments!
