Mothers have always been seen as endless sources of love and care. They fight for us, cry for us, and celebrate our joys, even when times are tough. But the thought of losing our moms is something we all dread.
Do you ever wake up from a bad dream and just want your mom? Or surprise her with an unexpected visit? Keep doing that! According to research, it might help her live longer.
Loneliness plays a big role in the decline that comes with aging. A study by researchers at the University of California, San Francisco, found that older adults who feel lonely are more likely to face health issues. The study involved 1,600 adults with an average age of 71. It controlled for factors like financial status and health. The results showed that lonely individuals had higher death rates. Nearly 23% of the lonely participants passed away within six years, compared to 14% of those who had enough companionship.
As people age, many of their relationships fade. Sadly, even the strongest bonds can weaken with time. Often, children leave their aging parents alone, not realizing how much they need companionship. Many don’t think about the possibility of not getting a chance to say goodbye.
Understanding the dangers of isolation can be tough. For example, if no one is checking on daily needs like food, medicine, or doctor appointments, things can quickly go downhill. “The fridge is empty, but there’s no one to call,” explains Ms. Moscowitz, a Senior Geriatric Social Worker at Massachusetts General Hospital. “People suffer from neglect and shame.”
Loneliness can take a serious toll on older adults, both mentally and physically. According to the Census Bureau, nearly a quarter of men over 75, and almost 46% of women, live alone. “The need for people who know us, value us, and bring us joy never goes away,” says Ms. Moscowitz.
Loneliness is dangerous. Studies show it’s linked to higher blood pressure, nursing home admissions, unhealthy habits like smoking, and even dementia. Older adults value their relationships deeply, often more than their children or grandchildren. Forgiveness comes easily to them. Rosemary Blieszner, a professor at Virginia Tech, says that older people have honed their social skills over a lifetime, making their friendships more stable and accepting. “You bring a lot more experience to your friendships when you’re older. You know what’s worth arguing about and what’s not,” she says.
Beyond inviting older family members home, it’s important to foster friendships at their level. Assisted living communities are often misunderstood, but they provide a space where older adults can thrive by connecting with others their age. When the quality of their social interactions improves, so does their longevity.
Spending quality time with your grandparents can have a huge impact on their well-being. And you might learn something valuable from their experiences. The time they spend with family gives them a sense of companionship and expression that’s vital at this stage of life.
Remember those secret recipes your grandma shared? Or the killer chess move your grandpa taught you? Even if you don’t have grandparents or parents, you can visit assisted living homes and connect with the elderly there. You might make a new friend faster than you think.
As we age, the way we prioritize friendships may change. Laura Carstensen, a Stanford University psychologist, developed a theory called “socioemotional selectivity.” It suggests that as people realize their time is limited, they focus on the relationships that matter most.
This study highlights how important friendships are in extending healthy lives. Social workers, senior center staff, and family caregivers can help by finding new ways for older adults to stay connected or make new friends.
